Tuesday, December 07, 2004

Happy Chanukah/Chanuka/ Hannukah/Hanukah/Hanuka...

Tonight is the first night of Chanukah. I lit the candles about an hour ago. It was a particularly special candle-lighting experience for me, because I am now using the menorah of my Grandmother, who passed away in February.

I thought I'd also use this moment to clear up a common misconception. Most Jewish children do not receive eight presents on Chanukah. And if they do, the gifts pretty much suck until the seventh or eighth night. For example, little Joel Cohenbergstein might receive a pair of socks on the first night, a dreidel on the second night, a pack of batteries on the third night (for the remote control car he'll receive on the eighth night), an ugly, oversized sweater from Aunt Edith ("You'll grow into it") on the fourth night, and so forth. The good gifts don't come until the last two nights.

I recall getting eight gifts only once. From what my mother tells me, I then became a rotten brat. So that was it for eight gifts. As much as I would have loved to have gotten more junk that would later get buried in my closet, I'm probably better off. If I had been spoiled more, I might not have become the anti-consumerism pinko that I am today.


At 1:04 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great work. You've just set our recruiting efforts back 25 years.

At 1:05 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

(Son of a bitch!) That was David.

At 4:42 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

heh-heh...you said pinko!


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